3 Warning Signs You’re Tempted to Cheat on Your Spouse (and how to avoid them!)

Are you ever tempted to cheat on your spouse? I’m pretty sure we all know that infidelity is never a good idea, but sometimes the temptation can be overwhelming. You may not even see it as temptation until you’re in the danger zone. If you’re starting to feel like straying from your relationship, it’s important to recognize the warning signs before it’s too late.

Let me tell you a story about a friend of mine, Sarah*.

Sarah had been married for several years and everything seemed great on the surface. However, as time went on, she started feeling neglected and unfulfilled in her relationship. The lack of emotional connection and intimacy left a void in her heart. And that’s when the temptation to cheat on her spouse crept in.

Sarah found herself seeking validation from others, craving attention and affection that she wasn’t receiving within her marriage. It was a slippery slope, as she found solace in the fleeting validation from outside sources. But deep down, she knew it wasn’t the right path to take.

As Sarah kept her secret desires hidden, she started feeling a growing sense of guilt and shame. The weight of the secret became heavier with each passing day. It was eating away at her, and she knew she had to make a choice.

Then one day, Sarah stumbled upon a Bible verse that struck a chord within her: “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.” (Hebrews 13:4, ESV) It served as a huge wake-up call, reminding her of the sanctity of marriage and the importance of remaining faithful.

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

Hebrews 13:4 ESV

With a heavy heart, Sarah decided to have an honest conversation with her spouse.

It wasn’t easy to admit to her husband that she had nearly become unfaithful, but Sarah believed in ‘honesty as the best policy.’ She expressed her feelings of neglect and unfulfillment, opening up about her struggles and desires. Through difficult but transparent conversation, they both realized the areas in their relationship that needed attention and made a commitment to work on them together.

As they sought counseling, prayed together, and actively invested in their marriage, Sarah discovered a newfound sense of fulfillment and connection. The temptation that once consumed her began to fade away. She realized that seeking validation from others was a temporary fix, while true fulfillment came from within her marriage and her relationship with God.

Sarah’s story gives us a clear image of how temptation creeps into our lives.

We believe there are three obvious signs of being vulnerable to the temptation of adultery. It’s important to remember that we all face challenges in our relationships, and recognizing these signs can help us navigate them with wisdom and grace.

Drawing from Sarah’s story, let’s explore these three signs that reveal we are at risk of straying from our commitment to our spouse.

1. FEELING NEGLECTED OR UNFULFILLED

Feeling neglected or unfulfilled in your relationship can create a vulnerability that makes you susceptible to temptation. Remember the Bible verse Sarah discovered, Hebrews 13:4, which highlights the importance of honoring and cherishing your marriage. If you’re experiencing these feelings, communicate openly with your partner and work together to find ways to rekindle the emotional and physical connection you crave. Creating that open communication with your spouse is a loving act that leads to harmony in your marriage.

And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

Colossians 3:14 ESV

2. SEEKING VALIDATION FROM OTHERS

Seeking validation from others outside your marriage can be a dangerous path. Instead of relying on external sources for approval, focus on building your self-esteem and finding validation in your relationship with God. 1 John 2:15 reminds us not to love the world or seek validation from it. Redirect your attention to nurturing your marriage and finding fulfillment within your committed relationship.

Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

1 John 2:15

3. KEEPING SECRETS FROM YOUR PARTNER

Hiding things from your partner, whether big or small, creates a rift in your relationship and opens the door for further temptations. James 5:16 urges us to confess our sins to one another and pray for healing. Be honest and transparent with your spouse, even when it’s difficult. Confession and open communication are crucial for maintaining trust and fostering a strong, faithful bond.

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

James 5:16 ESV

If you’re ever feeling tempted, take a step back and examine why you’re feeling that way.

Remember Sarah’s story and the choices she made. Let her journey inspire you to cherish and nurture your own relationship, honoring the vows you made to your spouse. By recognizing these warning signs, communicating openly, finding validation in God’s love, and maintaining transparency in your relationship, you can build a strong, healthy, and faithful bond with your spouse.